Treats

Last night was really beautiful so I biked myself over to Cafe Gelato for a treat that I'm sure pales in comparison to whatever Ben has in his mouth right now. He is in Napoli, going to Pizzerria da Michele, which if you have read Eat, Pray, Love, you will remember as the restaurant that quite possibly has the best pizza in the whole world. I was standing outside, eating my stracciatella, when I ran into someone I know through the school. She was out for her birthday, and I told her, "I'm just having a little treat." She responded saying, "Good for you!"

I keep thinking about this comment. She was just being nice and fun, but it seemed to cap something I'd been thinking about all week. Yesterday at work I was browsing through Jane Magazine and Glamour, which are full of one million things that it's telling women we deserve. Because we're worth it. And all the relationship advice says that men have to realize this and treat us right, and we should work out because our bodies deserve to look hot but we should be worshipped because we're attractive just the way we are and we should splurge on dessert or be lazy or go shopping because we deserve to be happy and feel special. There was this post on Missed Connections too. I think it's good to be positive and strive for a good self image, but I am amazed how deeply this selfish-image has gotten ingrained. The fact that this girl on MC can assume her situation is universal and say to strangers, "You are awesome, the boys are lame, they are missing out because you're so fabulous" is ridiculous. But that message is everywhere. And it's taken as fact, for anyone, regardless of circumstances. But circumstances are really important! You can't believe that everything you do is perfect and blameless and owed to you, because we're humans and being alive is more complicated. I think it's why some women end up so high maintenence. Everyone is telling them that they deserve EVERYTHING they want. Even things that contradict each other. I'm all for feminism and strong women with good self-confidence, but encouraging self-esteem through entitlement is a recipe for unrealistic expectations and disappointment. Not to mention bitchiness.

So even though I didn't deserve to have that treat, I certainly enjoyed it. Mmm. American Gelato.