endings and beginnings

Hello.

It has been a time of change. In the midst of my new/old/nonexistent job stress I was brought back to reality when my mom called to tell me that my grandma was in hospice care and that I should plan a trip to Milwaukee very quickly. I did make it home on Friday 9/5, after getting subs for first day of WW and piano classes and birthday party gigs. Grandma was to the point where she was just sleeping all the time and we could not rouse her. We visited with her and with our big family all weekend. There were sad and happy times, and lots of sharing of memories, both in and out of the hospice. Listening to a newly found recording of Grandma singing solo at Uihlein Hall in 1974. Singing The Lord Bless You and Keep you in her room. Singing karaoke songs we hadn't picked with Jesse at Frankenstein's. Listening to a cassette tape of my 8th grade interview with Grandma for a class project. Lunch in the Village with my mom and Betsy. Photos. Stories. Dinner and too much wine with Ben's family. Cousin Ryan's first football game. Frozen custard. Pizza or sub sandwiches in the family room of the hospice. Lots of hugs and tears and laughs. The nurses at the hospice told us we were giving a wonderful gift to Grandma and to the people on the floor by bringing so much laughter. By the end of the weekend Grandma's breathing was very labored and finally on Sunday night around 10, while her children and their spouses were around her singing, she took her last breath.

The funeral was the following Saturday. It was an incredible service. The Milwaukee Choristers (Grandma was a member for 41 years) sang, there were beautiful flowers everywhere, tons of funny and sweet photographs of Grandma and her loved ones, hundreds and hundreds of people, a wonderful meditation by J;m Rand, great hymns, bagpipes, and best of all the soaring high notes of Grandma's voice through the speakers. She would have loved it. So many people came. People from her many churches, friends from grade school, close and distant relatives, entire families of all of her children's spouses, Choristers, friends from the neighborhood. It was followed by a meal downstairs, also well attended, and finally at the end a little bit of time where it was just our family sitting around in the church basement talking and laughing and telling stories. We all drove out to the cemetery after that for the burial, where again we sang and cried and put flowers on her coffin amongst the big trees, as well as on the gravestones of her parents and uncles and aunts. We ate dinner at a big German restaurant, where we sang German songs and Scottish songs and cheered until they shut the door on us. We had custard for dessert, crowding around the booths in the corner of Omega. Butter Pecan-- Grandma's favorite!



I love my family.

Ben came too, for everything. He is part of our family and everyone loves him, including Grandma. We are so blessed to have such a family. This was the first time I lost a grandparent, and it was hard, but it was beautiful and a source of much learning. I was sad to leave all my relatives and head back to Chicago, but life goes on for the rest of us even after we pause to take notice of a life that has ended.

The new session of classes has been simultaneously energizing and exhausting. On Monday and Friday I am teaching six classes between WW and piano, which makes for really long days but I'm thankful for the work and at least there is a lot of variation from class to class. Kids' voice classes on Thursday, which have been fun and going really well with lots of help from Mom's folder of notes. I've been spending my vast new freetime doing productive things like drinking coffee, playing with the webcam Ben brought home from work, wearing my pajamas, and making a Facebook page for Adeline. I did manage to do some good hanging out with Meredith, plan some classes, go for a run, and clean a bunch of clothes out of my closets to try and sell/donate. I've subbed some classes and booked some gigs. In the evenings Ben and I have done some fun things like renting Paris Je'Teme and biking to Handlebar to do a crossword puzzle. I also had an exciting first rehearsal with the new band It's A Girl, which is Miki's project of songs of joy and redemption. Heavy on vocal harmonies and theatrics, made of Miki on vox and piano, Jason on vox banjo guitar, me on vox guitar piano drums (!), and Elizabeth singing too. What a relief to make happy music with fun people.

Gotta get out of the house!! It's not going to be 69 degrees and sunny forever.